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.We were blood-related, whether he liked it or not.Didn’t Ed DeBose know that science was supposed to be unprejudiced? I wanted to hit something, but I couldn’t make noise.I stood in front of the long mirror on my closet.I kicked to the front and my mirror self kicked back.I punched to the front.My mirror self punched back.Faster and faster, I kicked and punched.To the front.The back.Left.Right.Finally one giant jumping kick, then I crumpled on the ground.I had nothing left to kick or punch.I had kicked and punched all my mad feelings out.I lay there, nothing moving except my lungs.No sound except my breath.Eyes closed.Darkness.And then against the black screen in my head, one tiny yellow word: Why?One little word, only three letters long, but it was the biggest question I had ever come across.And science couldn’t answer it.CHAPTER 21Sunday came and went (thankfully Gladys wanted to stay home because she’d been to our house Friday and Saturday), then Monday.Still, I couldn’t seem to get the words out of my mouth that I’d gone with Ed on the expedition.Every time my parents came around, my tongue turned to cement.I kept telling myself I’d already been grounded for two weeks—how much worse could it get?My birthday was coming up.What if they said I couldn’t have a party—or there’d be no presents? I couldn’t tell them.Tuesday night was my purple belt exam.I spent most of the day in the basement, going over my forms.Mom and Dad came with me to the dojang.They sat in the back next to Khalfani’s dad.“How’s prison life?” Khal whispered when I joined him on the mat.I hadn’t even told Khal that I’d gone with Ed DeBose to hunt thunder eggs, but he knew that I’d been grounded for going to see him before.“All right,” I said, then fixed my eyes to the front, where Master Rickman was introducing the first testers—little guys who couldn’t have been older than five or six.The cho bo ja—beginners—wore white belts symbolizing innocence.A very long time ago, or so it seemed now, that had been me.We had to sit cross-legged and watch all the groups before us: white, yellow and blue.Just when I thought my butt couldn’t take any more, Master Rickman called for the blue belts with purple stripes.Khal nudged me.We walked to the front.Khal and I went first.I bowed, then stood in ready position.Each form we’d mastered required us to demonstrate a series of kicks and punches, in the correct order.Master Rickman gave us the signal, and we started to move through the hyungs for each level.Chon-ji came so easily at this point that I didn’t even have to think about it.Just like riding my bike.My bike.Would I ever get it back? My parents were letting me earn extra allowance by doing more chores so I could buy a new one, which I’d do after I sent Ed money for the pick.I forgot where I was in the sequence.I hesitated, feeling my ears get warm.I glanced at Khalfani, trying to remember what to do next, then jerked back into motion, hoping my mistake hadn’t been too noticeable.We moved on to dan-gun—planting the seeds.Then we were sprouting—do-san—the form for the yellow belt.Then on to won-hyo and yol-guk.Finally I reached joong-gun, the pattern I’d learned after I received the purple stripe on my blue belt.I flowed through it like the water in the stream at Olympic View Park.It was a cinch.After that, Khalfani and I had to demonstrate our kicks and punches in a sparring match.The hardest part was not touching each other.Our school of Tae Kwon Do uses noncontact sparring as a way to promote discipline.I spun, jumped and kicked.I blocked every one of Khal’s punches.I finished with the “killing blow”—my fist an inch away from Khalfani’s head.The last thing we had to do was pass the kyepka—the break test.Master Rickman placed a board in the holder on the wall.Khal turned to the side, balanced himself and shot his leg through the wood.Snap! He’d gotten it in one try!I wanted to high-five him, but I kept my cool.It was my turn.I stepped into position and focused on the board.Just as I was about to raise my leg, I caught Dad’s eye in the mirror.Suddenly I felt like Superman in front of kryptonite.I kicked in a feeble attempt, but I knew: I didn’t deserve the purple belt.Master Rickman let me try two more times.I broke the board on the third attempt, but still I knew.I couldn’t take the belt, even if it was offered.I bowed and returned to my seat on the ground.“What happened?” Khal asked.I just shrugged.The room was crowded and hot, the floor as hard as brick.My do bok seemed to have shrunk on my body.It felt two sizes too small.The belt was suddenly too tight.By the time the brown belts got up to test, I wanted to run out of the room.At the end of this exam, Master Rickman would call my name, bow to me and present me with my new belt.A belt I couldn’t accept.I hadn’t been noble at all [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]