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.” He noticed I was frowning.“Keep up.Skiing analogy.”I was confused.“I got the bumpy bits, but you said nine.”“Well, how long are most courtships and engagements?” He answered himself: “Two years.Makes nine.It’s no coincidence that you and I nearly got ourselves into trouble at just that moment.Don’t take this the wrong way.If it hadn’t been you, I’d probably have made a complete cock of myself with some intern.I was a statistic waiting to happen.I love my wife.Sometimes I don’t like her very much, because she’s a bossy old trout who knows too much about too many things.But that’s also why I love her.Following me?”“I think I need another drink.”It was my round.I came back with two more halves.“How’s everything with his kids?” asked Ben.I made a so-so gesture.“I fear I’ll become the wicked stepmother whatever I do.”“Don’t try to be a stepmother.Do what you do best.”“Get drunk and fall over?”He ignored me.“Just add three more godchildren to your list.”“My godchildren want to like me.”“The girls don’t like you?”“I thought I was beginning to wear them down with trendy designer clothes and CDs and sparkly cherry-flavored lip gloss, but I think they’re beginning to see through my cunning ruse.”“Subtle.”“As a beginners’ violin class.” I frowned, remembering the strangely solemn children we’d had staying with us the previous Wednesday.“I’m doing something wrong.”“Give them time,” said Ben.“It’s impossible not to love you.” I squeezed his hand and was reminded how much strength my friends gave me.And how much I’d missed him.“James asked me to marry him.They’re not going to get any time.”“You think it’s a bit premature?”“Oh, I don’t know.The rest of my life might not be enough time.But if that’s the case, should I do it at all? Does anyone like their stepmother?”“Of course they do.”“Who?”“You want a name?”“Yes.”“Well, not Cinde-fucking-rella.”“No,” I said, laughing in despair.“Not her.”“So what was it? Cloud-writing, hot-air balloon, Jamie Theakston asking you live on air on James’s behalf while you had tea in bed in the morning?”My shoulders dropped.“Oh, no,” said Ben, with a grand smile.“He messed up.”“You could say that.”“Thank God.Couldn’t have been worse than mine.”“You asked Sasha in Paris, Eiffel Tower.You’re going to tell me now she had vertigo?”He pulled a face.“That was the second time.”You think you know a person…“What was the first?”“Not my finest hour.”“Please tell me.You’ll make me feel so much better.”“You ever tell Sasha I told, and we’re finished.”“I hear you.Now, spill.”“Six o’clock in the morning, off my tits on E—”“What?”“I had a brief purple patch.Anyway, stripped down to jeans, all sweaty and jittery, I shouted my proposal outside her bedroom window, then slipped into some semiconscious state and had to be taken to a hospital to have my stomach pumped.”“Nice.”“She swore me to secrecy.”“Not a hard one to keep.”“No.Absolutely humiliating.But I meant what I’d said.”“I always thought the Eiffel Tower was a bit over the top.Now I understand you had some ground to make up.”“And did you note the size of the diamond?”“Often.”“Okay.Your turn.”“Northern Line.Eight fifty-three a.m.”“Late!”“Exactly.”THAT NIGHT I WENT BACK to my flat happy, thanks to Ben.What did the tube matter? What did surly kids matter? Kids were surly, they answered back, had tantrums, sulked.I shouldn’t take it personally.All that mattered was the question and who had asked it.My James Kent.Salt-and-pepper Man was going to marry me.I heard his familiar rata-tat-tat on my door and ran to open it.I threw myself around his neck and clung to him like a monkey [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]